Evil Sweater

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The Evil Sweater and Other Stories pretty much represents my stupid sense of humor. If you think the whole concept of an evil sweater is funny, well, you've come to the right place, because I wrote the first draft of this book in 2000 and I still chuckle at it.

Book jacket teaser? Here ya go:

HAVE YOU EVER HEARD A SWEATER SCREAM?

I bet you haven't.

Meet Stan, a totally rotten sweater who will stop at nothing to destroy the other clothes in his owner's closet and become the only garment she will ever wear. Can a gutsy sweater named Naomi defeat Stan and rescue her fellow clothes from his yarny oppression?

In this incredibly silly book, you will also meet a spaceship named Chachimiwhizzle, a baseball team with a lot of "fowl" balls, a snot-nosed vampire, a trash-talking ukulele, and many more of the goofiest things you've ever heard.

This book is organized around the title story, "The Evil Sweater," which is broken into five parts. In between each of these parts are two different short stories. Though all the stories are unrelated, they all bring some fantastical element into real life. And they're related by my stupid sense of humor, too.

Stories/Chapters:

  1. The Evil Sweater, Part One: Candy's Clothing
  2. Sasha Po and the Mean Ukulele
  3. Hatched
  4. The Evil Sweater, Part Two: Two Roads Diverged in a Yellow Room
  5. Spout
  6. Dolores on Duty
  7. The Evil Sweater, Part Three: Trouble in the Sock Drawer
  8. Monster Night
  9. Sixteen Toes
  10. The Evil Sweater, Part Four: Bedroom Battleground
  11. The 'Elling Bees
  12. The Well-Wishing Wishing Well
  13. The Evil Sweater, Part Five: Cleaning Day

 

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